Personally I’m a big fan of analogies. They make me smile and I love the connection you can make between something and a gentle reminder ‘life lesson’.
So roll with me. Let’s use this analogy-
Imagine when you drive and you happen to get lost in the scenery. You’re noticing all the things. Maybe you even check out the cars that are driving by you (“I wonder where they’re going?” or, “Wow, that’s a fancy car… much better than my car.”). Maybe you get lost in your own thoughts and you’re in your own la-la land (i.e. replaying a conversation over and over in your head).
I like the analogy of “stay in your own lane” because I think it has such connections to…
comparisons.
Life comparisons.
When we let our eyes veer off our own path in life and we start to look in the next lane with comparisons. We may be apt to compare the type of car we’re driving (or clothes we’re wearing or how we look), or how fast someone else is driving (or progressing through life), etc. etc. etc.
The key is:
Stay in your own lane.
Focus on you. Not on them. Not on others.
When we start focusing on what other people may be thinking, doing, “perceiving”, expressing, etc., we lose sight on our own lane.
Frankly, other people may be looking at you in your fancy car (or insert whatever here… your new life chapter, new house, new boyfriend, new travels, etc. etc.), and playing the comparison game.
Both aren’t necessarily helpful, right?
When we look over to another lane then our own lane can get blurry. We start to lose sight of our own path when we start focusing on someone else’s. We may fall victim to envy or gossip. The more we drift, the more we may not even see our own lane lines anymore. And frankly, our lane may start to look very similar to the adjacent one and we don’t even recognize our own lane anymore.We don’t even recognize ourselves anymore.
Focus on you. Be true to you.
This has been a true statement for me as I continue to grow older. As I continue to grow and learn (‘continue’ being the key word here), I bask in that peacefulness of contentment when they feeling washes over me. A contentment that I know what I’m doing is right for me. It doesn’t matter what’s going on in the lane next to me, what other people may perceive me doing or not doing (which their perception may or may not even be accurate), but enjoying the contentment of being me.
I find that when I stick to what I’m doing, I’m happier. When I’m real, to me it means (trying to) avoid gossip, not interpreting the thoughts of others, or even being fake in personality. That’s definitely not me. And it doesn’t feel like me.
Let me be sure to differentiate the “focus on you” is not what I’m insinuating to be arrogance or selfishness. Because whoa baby, the whole “I know everything” focus-on-you behavior surely isn’t helpful. But a focus on the self care of being authentic to your true self and honoring what you truly value… without looking at the other cars driving by. Who cares what they’re doing, saying, driving, etc. Focus on your lane and making the right decisions for you.
Sometimes I need my own reminder of this and I figure if I need my own reminder, maybe you do too. If you haven’t noticed, I’ve had a bit of hiatus of writing on BeWellWellness. And that’s okay. Life shifts have brought me back to this typing space.
Focus on you. Be true to you.
In health,
Laura